I’m 40! Here Are 40 Things Being a Personal Assistant Has Taught Me About People
Today, I turn 40.
There is something about saying that out loud that feels a little surreal. Forty sounds like an age when you are supposed to have everything figured out, but if my first 40 years have taught me anything, it is that none of us really has it all figured out. We are all learning, adjusting, changing and trying to make life work in the best way we know how.
One of the things I feel incredibly fortunate about is the work I get to do. As a personal assistant in Calgary, I am invited into the everyday lives of busy professionals, entrepreneurs, parents and families. I see the things that make people's lives easier, the things that overwhelm them, the things they keep putting off and the things they simply do not have the capacity to deal with themselves.
Being a personal assistant has taught me a lot about organization and life admin, but more importantly, it has taught me a lot about people.
So, in honour of turning 40, here are 40 things being a personal assistant has taught me about people.
1. Everyone has more going on than you realize
You can look at someone's life from the outside and think they have everything under control. You rarely know the full story.
2. Busy does not always mean productive
Someone can have a completely full calendar and still feel like they accomplished nothing. Being busy and actually getting the right things done are two very different things.
3. Asking for help is harder than it sounds
Some of the most capable people I know struggle to ask for help. They are used to being the person everyone else relies on.
4. People are often carrying invisible mental loads
Remembering appointments, returns, birthdays, errands, school activities, household tasks and a hundred little details takes energy, even when none of it appears on a calendar.
5. Small tasks can create enormous stress
An Amazon return might take ten minutes. Finding the time, remembering to do it, locating the item and actually getting it out the door can occupy someone's mind for days.
6. Everyone has a task they absolutely hate
And honestly, I love that I get to take some of those tasks off people's plates.
7. Delegating does not mean you are incapable
In fact, I think it often means the opposite. Knowing what you should do yourself and what someone else can handle is a skill.
8. People care deeply about reliability
When someone says they will take care of something, you want to know it will actually get done. Being dependable is one of the most valuable things you can offer another person.
9. Organization looks different for everyone
There is no single right way to have an organized life. What matters is finding systems that work for you.
10. People procrastinate for very different reasons
Sometimes it is lack of time. Sometimes it is boredom. Sometimes it is overwhelm. Sometimes it is simply a task they do not want to deal with.
11. Being successful does not mean having endless capacity
High-achieving people get overwhelmed too. Success does not make someone immune to having too much on their plate.
12. People want to feel understood
Sometimes what a client really needs is not just someone to complete a task, but someone who understands what they are asking for without making them explain every little detail.
13. Details matter
A small detail that seems insignificant to one person can be incredibly important to another. Paying attention matters.
14. People remember how you make their lives feel
They may not remember every task you completed, but they remember feeling supported, understood and relieved.
15. Everyone has their own version of “normal”
What looks completely manageable to one household might feel chaotic to another. There is no universal standard for how life should be run.
16. Sometimes the best solution is simply to get it done
Not every problem needs a complicated system. Sometimes you just need someone to take care of it.
17. People are more sentimental than they let on
Objects, photographs, clothing, gifts and family belongings can carry much more meaning than their practical value suggests.
18. Good communication solves a lot
Being clear about expectations, asking questions and keeping people informed can prevent so many problems.
19. People appreciate initiative
There is a big difference between waiting to be told every step and noticing what needs to happen next.
20. Nobody enjoys feeling behind
That feeling of constantly being one step behind your own life can be exhausting. Sometimes getting a few things off the list can make a bigger difference than people expect.
21. People have different definitions of urgent
What feels urgent to one person may not even register on someone else's radar. Understanding priorities is part of understanding people.
22. Privacy matters
Being trusted with someone's personal life is a responsibility I take seriously. Discretion and confidentiality are not extras. They are part of the job.
23. Free time is not wasted time
People often feel like they need to be productive every minute of the day. But having time to sit with your family, take a walk, enjoy a hobby or simply do nothing has value too.
24. You can be capable and still have too much on your plate
Being capable does not mean you have unlimited time, energy or capacity. Sometimes the issue is not whether you can do something, but whether you should be the one doing it.
25. People are often harder on themselves than anyone else is
I have seen how quickly people can turn an unfinished to-do list into a judgment about themselves. Having a lot to do does not mean you are failing.
26. Sometimes people just need someone in their corner
There is something powerful about knowing someone is there to help when life gets busy.
27. Everyone has seasons when they need more support
Life changes. New jobs, children, aging parents, moves, travel, business growth and countless other transitions can change what someone can reasonably handle.
28. Paying for help is about more than convenience
Sometimes people think of hiring help as a luxury, but what they are really buying is time, mental space and the ability to focus their energy elsewhere.
29. People are incredibly resourceful
I am constantly impressed by what people manage to accomplish while balancing careers, families, businesses and everything else life throws at them.
30. Boundaries are important
Being helpful does not mean saying yes to everything. Good relationships, including professional ones, need clear expectations and boundaries.
31. People notice consistency
Doing a good job once is great. Doing a good job over and over again is what builds trust.
32. Everyone has a different comfort level with control
Some people want every detail planned. Others are happy to hand something over and say, “Just take care of it.” Neither is wrong.
33. Sometimes the hardest part is starting
A task can sit on someone's list for weeks simply because getting started feels overwhelming. Once someone else takes the first step, everything can feel easier.
34. A fresh perspective can change everything
Sometimes you are too close to a problem to see the easiest solution. Having someone else look at a situation can make something that felt complicated suddenly feel very simple.
35. The little things really do matter
Picking something up, dropping something off, making an appointment or taking care of a return might seem insignificant. But collectively, those little things can make someone's week feel completely different.
36. Progress feels good
Sometimes getting even one thing crossed off a long list can create a surprising sense of relief. Progress does not have to be dramatic to make a difference.
37. People change
And their needs change with them. The person who needed one kind of support six months ago may need something completely different today.
38. Your time has value
One of the biggest things I have learned is that people often underestimate the value of their own time. Spending an hour on something simply because you can do it does not mean that is the best use of your time.
39. We all need help sometimes
That is not a failure. It is part of being human.
40. People are what make the work worthwhile
The best part of being a personal assistant is not checking things off a list. It is knowing that the work I do makes someone's day a little easier.
And now, I'm 40.
If you had asked me years ago what I thought turning 40 would look like, I probably would have imagined something very different.
But I am incredibly grateful for where I am.
I have built a business that I genuinely love. I get to work with amazing people in Calgary. I get invited into the everyday details of their lives, and I have learned something from almost every person I have worked with.
Running Better Than A Bot has taught me about business, certainly. But it has taught me even more about people, including myself.
I have learned that being capable does not mean doing everything yourself. That asking for help is not weakness. That sometimes the smallest things can make the biggest difference. And that there is a lot of value in having someone you can simply say, “Can you take care of this?” to.
So, here's to 40.
To everything I have learned, everything I still have to learn, the people who have been part of my journey, and whatever comes next for both me and BTAB.
I don’t know exactly what my 40s will look like, but I know I’m ready for them!
